Since I was about 21, I’ve had a fear of grain, flour, and starch carbohydrates. Not just white bread carbs, but also things like beans and sweet potatoes. I’m not sure if I’ve ever outwardly stated that on my blog before, but there ya have it.
That’s not to say that I didn’t eat them, it just always was kind of a “treat” in my mind. I know I’ve written time and time again about how I’m working to repair my relationship with food, but you can probably tell from most of the recipes I’ve shared are not carb-heavy at all. Or my “What I Ate Wednesday” posts – here is one and another where I ate very little of those forbidden carbs all day, and I would say that that was a very normal weekday for me. It wasn’t until this winter when I tried to integrate more carbs into my day to day that I found myself gaining weight, and that freaked me out more – was I destined to a life without carbs? Every time I would try and healthfully incorporate more sweet potatoes or brown rice it was like my body would harbor all of those carbs as pounds. So I removed starches and grains from my “routine” diet again this past spring.
But…it just didn’t feel right. I had met with a nutritionist last year who I loved, and she incorporated a lot of really healthy habits into my day-to-day that I’m really appreciative of. Honestly though, I never felt like I was moving towards a more healthful relationship with food overall, and I also was gaining weight while eating what I considered really healthfully – low carb during the week, enjoying carbs on the weekend. The thing was, is that I didn’t feel “unsatisfied” or undernourished, and I ate a ton of vegetables and healthy proteins and healthy fats. To me, this seemed like I should be at my optimal weight and energy levels, and instead I was gaining.
I reached out to Robyn, a dietitian and nurse who shares a lot on her blog about helping women eat more to balance their hormones and return to a happy state with food. Her posts really resonate with me, and I remember reading for years thinking “man, if only I could eat like Robyn!” So I reached out, and set up some time with her partner Cody at Nutshell Nutrition to discuss my story and a path forward.
I totally bonded with Cody from our first chat, and to summarize what we discussed – likely the years of restricting carbs and internal stress behind that and all of my other food control issues has caused all sorts of hormonal imbalances within my system that hey – big surprise – has kind of caused me to go into metabolic hibernation of sorts. Since I wasn’t giving my body enough carbohydrates and nutrition some days, the other days when I did it went into storage mode. Great news – it’s reparable!
So now, I’m working on a plan that has me eating a significant more amount of carbohydrates and healthy fats than I’m used to. And just eating straight up more than I’m used to. I’m both excited – because I love sweet potatoes and nut butter and food – but I’m also nervous because there is probably inevitable weight gain at the beginning of this while everything heals. The opposite of everything I’ve tried to work against these past 5 years, right? Well, I trust Cody and Robyn, and I’m going to give it a try.
Hello to the summer of carbs, 2016!
Thanks for stopping by! 
Aahh Dani I can SO relate to this. Like… 110%. I look back two years ago and I was restricting so much. And just like you, even sweet potatoes and black beans. I think over the past year I feel as though I’ve gained quite a bit of weight because I finally started adding a lot more carbs into my diet. Mind you two years ago I look back at pictures and while I look thinner, I also know I wasn’t necessarily happier. And I’ve got more muscle on too. It is such a tricky balance! I’ll be interested to see how it pans out for you!
Ahh good to know that it’s all turned out for the better…I’ll keep you posted!
Well, if you need help eating carbs, I’m your girl ;D But I am proud of you for working through this! You are a little younger than me, so Atkins was a BIG DEAL during your formative years. That has to have a big impact on your outlook on carbs!
I shied away from bread carbs for a long time (when I was losing weight after steroid weight gain) but now, you know me, I’m a fan.
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It’s funny because my parents are very anti-fat since they grew up in the low fat/non fat craze but I have definitely been all in in the low carb.
I am so glad that you’re on the path to a better relationship with food! I really struggled with my own relationship with food and exercise until last year and I still deal with hormonal issues, so if you ever need someone to talk to, I’m always here. I wish you the best of luck, Dani! <3
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So good to hear! I may take you up on that offer!
I love that you shared this. I especially love that you reached out to such a respectable RD. Seeing what Robyn eats really helps me too! I’ve feared carbs in the past, but mostly when I just feared food in general. Now I realize how important carbs are for our brains to function!
I have recently been incorporating more meat into my diet because I am learning my body prefers less fiber. It’s so hard to change my diet when I’ve eaten heavy plant based for so long. Feeling better is so worth it (and delicious!!)
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We’re constantly adjusting based on what works for our body!!
Interesting post! Thanks for sharing Dani. Our relationships with food can be so complex and deep, and it’s awesome that you’re working to make it more healthy and balanced. YAY for healthy carbs!
Yes!! So true. I wish I spent less time thinking about food, but so it goes.
A few years ago, I was trying to lose some weight and was so scared of carbs! I think I know found a healthy balance (I love how carbs are encouraged in the running community). Now I need to find which carbs are good for my gut!
A few years ago I was trying to lose some weight and I was so afraid of carbs. I’ve found a pretty good balance now and it helps that carbs are encouraged in the running community. Now my next challenge is to figure out with ones vibe well with my gut.
It’s a journey, for sure! You definitely need carbs if you’re exercising!
I love that you reached out for help so you could do what is right for your body! That is a HUGE step.
For me, I’m a carb eating queen. My body doesn’t do well with heaps of protein (my liver kinda of decides it has better things to do and gives up) so I am ALL about carbs and fats.
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Man, Robyn is just the greatest! Her blog has also helped me to strive to break “food rules” and defy “food fears”. It’s really so silly that I avoided some of these thing and restricted them. Just like you, I love nut butter and sweet potatoes, so why deny myself of the fuel I need and crave? I’ll be rooting for you girl!
xxMeah
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I’m so proud of you for taking such a scary risk. I’ve often heard that, while a low-carb diet can lead to initial weight loss, it also causes weight gain in the long run. And yeah, that is going to be scary. Still, I’ve found in recovery from my eating disorder that doing the scary thing is often doing the right thing. I hope this challenge helps you feel better in the long run!
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Dani this is SO great hearing you share this - thank you so much for your honesty and vulnerability. It definitely is not easy to admit to past “diets” or “beliefs” we once followed. Carbs have been the largest struggle for me and my eating disorder history. For some reason I’d even feel “better” having a huge bowl of ice cream than a few pieces of toast. And I have a really awful voice inside that sometimes still says, “well at least it wasn’t wheat.” (ugh - awful). I hate that somewhere in our upbringing carbs were instilled in us to be so “bad,” because its just not true. A good healthy amount of carbs - including wheat and grains - is absolutely part of a healthy diet. But it makes sense that if we’ve deprived ourselves of them in the past, that now when we do bring them back into our diet, our digestion may have a bit of confusion about what to do with them. But trust Robyn… she’s obviously a gem… that after just some time our bodies will adjust and our metabolisms will get re-worked. I’m so excited for you. Let’s embrace those healthy carbs as part of a fulfilling healthy day of eats.
thank you for sharing, Dani!! i know my metabolism is probably crazy messed up right now, as i can’t seem to stop gaining weight (slowly about 2 years ago, and a bit faster the past 6-9 months). it’s SO frustrating, as i eat pretty healthy and exercise consistently, etc. AND am helping my friends be healthier (successfully). i’m trying to change things every few/several months if something isn’t working, but, nope. it means a lot that you shared this. i might reach out to a dietician in a year or so when i have more time to meet and plan a lot, but… we’ll see. thanks again, and i cant wait to hear more.
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